It Always Seems to be Too Little, Too Late

In Buenos Aires, The Art of Travel Spring 2018, 15. Farewells, Places by CY2 Comments

2 semesters in a row I’ve dreaded the end of the semester, because of how I know the relationships with the friends I’ve made here will never be the same again, and how I might never ever see some of them ever again and I’ve literally only became really close to some of them merely days ago.

I was having a conversation with such a friend the other day and I told him how I wished we had spent more time hanging out, because he’s such a cool person and we are very similar and we vibe really well but we literally only have a week left. I hardly got to know him. And he doesn’t go to NYU, he’s just a visiting student here and so it’s hard to say if we’ll ever even see each other again.

Something that makes me even sadder is how I don’t know when is the next time I will see my housemate, and my best friend this semester. He’s American, I’m Singaporean, but he goes to NYU Shanghai and I go to the New York campus. We’ve both been here both semesters and this semester we’ve lived in the same apartment, so we’ve basically spent virtually all 24 hours the whole semester together. It was his birthday 2 days ago and he reminded me of the fact that we only have 8 days left. 8 days until I don’t know when we’ll see each other again. We both love to travel and we’re never in the same place for an extended period of time, so we’re sure we’ll see each other somewhere in the world sometime in the future.

For now, uncertainty of the future of such relationships is tinged with sadness.

Prior to studying away I haven’t really enjoyed my time in NYU that much because all my closest friends were Singaporean, and I never really met Americans that I got along that well with because of cultural, age and personality differences. But these 2 semesters I have met some of the best people I think I will ever meet. And it saddens me that whenever, wherever I see them again, it will never be the same, because we will never all truly be in the same kind of context where we are a tight-knit community enjoying each other’s company everyday ever again.

They always say to look on the bright side of life, and the bright side is that I’ve made really good friends here, hopefully friends for life and while I am weighed down by the sadness, I am also excited for the different sides of them I’ll get to know in a different environment, and how they’ll grow and change before we meet again.

Such is life, even in the bad we can find the good, and vice versa.

I’ve dreaded the end so much I don’t even have a flight out of Buenos Aires yet, and I’m supposed to be leaving in a week.

We always tell ourselves to live in the moment, and that we only truly have now, and yet even with the past lessons of life, I have yet to truly grasp this concept, because I keep thinking that I’m still young, and I still have time, until I don’t really have that time anymore. I live my life without any regrets because I almost make my decisions consciously at that exact moment in time with all the information that I have. It’s just tragically comical that it always seems to be too little too late.


(Image: Sunset from a plane; Source: CY)

Comments

  1. This post is filled with uncertainty, tension, and sadness––but also charged with the happiness and gratefulness that spending a semester (or two, in your case) in an incredible place brings. Saying goodbye is hard, impossible sometimes. But as cliche as it is, look at endings as a “see you later” rather than a hard and fast goodbye. I feel lucky that most of the friends that I made in Sydney go to the NYU campus in New York, but there are a few locals that I will probably never see again. My experience has been shaped by those who I met by chance, through other locals, or even because of a friend’s Bumble date. These are the goodbyes that are separated by a 20+ hour plane ride, and the hardest to let go.

  2. Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened. I get caught up in the same mindset as you constantly, even right now I’m dreading going back to NYC and not living with my roommate. I think, however, it’s important to remember that everything is finite, no matter what we say or do, things will, unfortunately, come to a close. But it’s living those experiences that makes it all worthwhile. Though you might not see your roommate for a long time, the time you spent together invariably shaped who you are. Whether or not you physically see each other might be an unfortunate reality, treasure the time you have remaining, and remember that Skype can be your best friend 🙂

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